My mom's constant nagging and the timely accusation from my sister has tremendously helped me in my writings. Yeah! Yeah! Whatever! Anyway, today I would like to let you know about the eight guys you will see back home. Out of the eight, you might be familiar with at least one of them. And yes, I don’t want to have flings with any of them, I am here for a great family time, I bet ;)
The One who is now branded as ‘Ex!’
Once upon a time you held his hands, kissed him and might have made clumsy love, boo hoo, that is history. Things did not work between you two, you moved on, he moved on. Your bad luck if he ended up with one of your cousins or the bitchy girl from your college. You might meet him in one of the corners, he might be single, nonetheless, you never liked Nicholas Sparks’ treatment of romance, so you say ‘Hello!’ and walk out without feeling empty.
The One whom you never stopped Crushing
He was cute then, hot now, isn’t he? He is still unemployed, stays with his parents, and got his graduation degree with great obstacles, but it does not matter to you, you were foolish then, you are foolish now. He might be more successful than what I have written in the above lines, he might be married and have six kids, but it does not matter to you because you never got over him, you still have the gigantic infatuation on him. Oh, Scarlett O’ Hara get over him before someone leaves you by saying, ‘Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn!’
The One who never got over You
In some mindless teenage days, you might have smiled at him or accepted the Friendship Day card from him, although it meant nothing to you, for him, it was the beginning of his life-long struggle with Florentino syndrome. You were his puberty fantasy, he had planned a wedding and 50th Wedding Anniversary with you on his mind. He is not psychotic, he is harmless, so harmless that you have forgotten his existence. Sorry, this post might make you recall someone like him.
The One who now rocks like Zac Efron
Once upon a time he was the awkward teenage guy everyone made fun of. He might have been your classmate or one of the boys from your hood. His face might have been covered with pimples and he might have been overweight. The society which loves superficially did not tolerate him as the way he was, he was ridiculed now and then. You felt sorry for him and wished upon a star to transform him. Time escaped, now he owns a body to die for, his face looks like one of the Calvin Klein models and the ones who made fun of refuses to accept their misbehaviour. He had the last laugh. Are you happy for him? Yes, you do, yet, make sure you do not fall for him.
The One who is now super Successful
The underdog, the one with the poor grades, the boy who was least expected to succeed. This particular boy has proven everyone wrong. Going by layman’s definition of success, he is super successful. He has a high paying job, has an imported car, a beautiful loving wife who has a million dollar profession of her own, and kids who are doing exceptionally well in their primary school and they go abroad for holidays with his parents and in-laws. Do you want to call him for delivering the motivational speech at your friend’s (the one who used to bully him) charity event?
The One who was once a Playboy
Once upon a time, he uses to brag about his skills to make a woman go nuts for him. His sexual partners were more than the number of nations (once) under the British Empire. Surprisingly, he never contacted STD, HIV/AIDS and all shit of diseases transmitted through sex. Now, you are surprised to meet him. He is married and has three daughters, he is a loyal husband and a caring father who spends his weekend changing diapers, cooking and fixing washbasins. Aren’t you happy for such transformation in him? One cannot blame you for plotting an epic revenge if you were one of the women he slept and never cared to call again.
The One who has the status of Celebrity
If there is a term called ‘pseudo-intellectual’ then there should be a term called ‘pseudo-celebrity’ too. Sometimes, there are some individuals who with their talents try to achieve something great, sad, they get stuck in one of the realms and does not crack it further, we call them ‘local celebrities’ but when they are arrogant about and shows off the very little thing they have achieved then we do not mind them calling ‘pseudo-celebrities’. In your home town, you will find a guy lingering around with a guitar, or a book or paint brush or a gas stove, everyone knows him, he has appeared in the local newspapers, however, it hardly matters to you.
The One your family and relatives want to set you up With
You have reached the peak of your marriageable age (stupid social construction), everyone in your family except you is getting panicky. So here comes the guy whom you want to avoid for three reasons, (a) you are single and wants to be this way for some period of time, (b) you are in love with someone which none of your family members is aware of, (c) you are not into guys, however, you are yet to come out of the closet. He might be handsome or moderately good looking, he might have a decent earning job and he might fit perfectly well in your family frame, but you are not ready, which means your family should respect your decision and stop throwing emotional drama.
Do you agree with the list?
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